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‘Koi mera fan nahi hai ghar mein’: Anil Kapoor on raising ‘idealistic, independent’ children

 ​Anil Kapoor on parenting independent children. (Source: Instagram/@anilkapoor). At first glance, it might seem like Anil Kapoor’s admission echoes every Indian father’s sentiment. But on closer inspection, the Animal actor’s statement hints at pride. Despite achieving fame and success in Bollywood, his children chose to carve out their own path and not rely on his stardom. At home, too, they don’t treat him any differently or bend over backwards for his approval. During a recent conversation, Kapoor opened up about raising confident children.. “Mera bada clear hai, apne bachhon ke saath (I have it very clear with my kids). All my children are very idealistic, very independent, and they are worse than me. Koi mera fan nahi hai ghar mein, koi bhi nahi hai, ratti bhar (No one in my family is my fan, not a single soul),” he told NDTV.. Decoding his parenting philosophy. Rima Bhandekar, Mpower Helpline, at Aditya Birla Education Trust, said that Kapoor’s parenting style focuses on letting children be independent and grow into their own.. “This style of parenting focuses on providing children ample independence and distance to develop, and at the same time support when required, and is very different from helicopter parenting, where parents are around all the time. Such parents let their children know that their assistance is available when wanted by the children,” she explained.. View this post on Instagram. According to her, the aim of such parenting is to encourage children to explore on their own and learn alongside, thereby naturally boosting their internal confidence to solve issues and make independent decisions. “A parent may encourage their children to try new activities and face challenges without the parent promptly helping them. The central concept is to let children navigate their own understanding of their world and develop competencies, while parents are there to guide as necessary,” said Bhandekar.. Such independent-focused parenting comes with its own set of challenges and pitfalls:. Children start handling challenges on their own without expecting their parents to step in.. Their confidence develops gradually through trial-and-error learning, and they know they can succeed after initial failure.. Children develop an understanding of various situations, how they feel in them, and how to face others with confidence.. Children face less pressure from their parents to conform, and develop at their own pace. However, some children may not be able to cope with too much independence as it may leave them feeling disorganized or overpowered, or may not know when to call for help, said Bhandekar, adding that few may also need help with controlling their impulsive behaviour with clear-cut instructions, parental expectations and discipline, without which there could be issues in social or academic settings.. ALSO READ | ‘Gentle parenting left me drained’: Why more Indian parents are embracing ‘FAFO parenting’ to let  

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